Part 1 - Dream Big, Be Successful, and Stay Grounded
For this 2-part article series, I interviewed coach Niki Vinogradoff to grasp how we can leverage dopamine from big dreams, be successful while staying grounded, and connect with loved ones.
Who is Niki Vinogradoff?
Niki Vinogradoff has led 1000+ sessions of neuroscience-based coaching and over 5500 hours of meditation. He helps business owners to master their minds so they can create financial stability through focused 6-8 hour work days, and have an abundance of energy and time for growth, meditation, family, and exercise. You can sign up to his Focus like a Yogi newsletter here.
Why I interviewed a neuroscience-based leadership coach
I have followed Niki for years on LinkedIn and have participated in a range of his mindfulness sessions. I always learn a thing or two about how the brain works, why we stand in our own way, and what we can do to zero-in on goals and dreams from them. I wanted to bring this experience to you through 2 articles full of his insights.
He’s also been very kind to share a 15-minute mindfulness meditation with us, which I’ve included at the end of this article. I hope his suggestions help you craft the fulfilling life you seek!
Based on how much time is spent on social media, would you say the world has a dopamine problem?
In reality, the world’s dopamine problem is actually a problem of lacking purpose or meaning. Dopamine is directly connected to how much meaning we create in our lives.
We gain energy and excitement from something that truly matters to us. That's the healthy type of dopamine - similar to what our ancestors used to get when they were out hunting for their tribe’s survival, for example. It made them courageous and resilient.
Dopamine from social media hits differently. It doesn’t get triggered because of the phone, rather the fact that we are anticipating something important. We crave more hits of this quick dopamine when we don’t know what we are doing.
Purposeful dopamine, on the other hand, comes from engaging in activities that mean something to us, like an artist or business owner focusing on their work. These activities bring lasting satisfaction and are beneficial to our lives because there’s a reward involved, thereby creating a positive and energising upwards spiral.
The main issue is that people don't invest a lot of time in meaningful things, causing an addiction to the wrong type of dopamine.
What gives your life meaning and how can we discover ours?
Meaning arises from self-discovery and an understanding of why we do what we do. I strongly wanted to become a coach 6 years ago, and in 2018, my coach asked me why exactly. His set of questions made me realise that if I didn’t become a coach, I wouldn’t live up to my purpose. The genuine answer moved me to tears;
As a coach, I love it when people truly experience their power and discover their deepest dreams and intentions.
When clients discover their purpose and tell me “I want to live a life of adventure” or “I want to help people heal”. Only then did I ask them the HOW questions, such as: “How would you bring that into the world? What would be the best channel for you to express that?” We must have the commitment and determination before we begin to wonder about the how questions.
Many people are stuck in the “how” questions. The answer to “Why do you want to do this?” differs from person to person and is rarely logical. We must stay committed to finding meaning and asking ourselves deep questions.
Lots of people think a job will give them meaning but this is a mistake. You have to find meaning in what you’re doing and express it to the world. The “why” behind the meaning will bring you to the “how” of expressing this meaning, and powerful and stable emotions are a telltale sign of it.
How can focusing on big dreams help us increase our dopamine levels, satisfaction, and resilience?
I’ll give you an example of a client who came to me with a question. She dreams of becoming an impactful internationally recognized consultant
“I get stuck in these loops where I'm resentful towards people and want to let go of it, Niki”, she said.
“What is that costing you?” I asked.
“Well, it's costing me mental energy, time and attention,” she replied.
“And, as you think about your dreams, what would you want to use the attention and time for instead?”
“To think clearly, and make better decisions, because that contributes to my big dream of being an international educational consultant.”
That’s how I help clients connect their immediate problems to their big dreams. Our brain works differently when we are focused on what matters. That’s why linking everyday challenges to a significant goal helps increase your motivation because your actions are no longer isolated or linked to a problem.
Do this and you’ll see that distractions fade away and you’ll become resilient against impulsive behaviour.
Your dreams must also be taken seriously and kept alive, as their effects reach far and wide: you don’t just help yourself but also others when achieving them. I, for example, stay inspired by spending almost an hour each day connecting with my dreams. This daily commitment ensures I’m truly living and not just alive.
How do you strike a balance between ambitious goal setting, and staying grounded and connected with your loved ones?
It is possible to have a balance, that is to say, achieve your ambitious goals whilst staying grounded. You can do this by integrating loved ones into your dreams and taking small steps every day rather than jumping in all at once. Trying to make big unclear leaps makes us lose energy and get frustrated, whereas small, clear, daily steps are effective.
One of my goals for the next 3 years is to offer retreats and write books e.g., and I move towards those goals every day through specific daily actions. This prevents me from feeling overwhelmed and keeps the process both manageable and enjoyable. Plans will need to be changed and refined along the way - that’s normal.
People forget that balance implies being present and intentional in all areas of life, not just one. I, just like many of my clients, have neglected other areas of life in the past too. This is the main cause of problems; When you only focus on business and neglect health and relationships, you can easily fall into burnout.
Your passion (what you love and like) needs purpose (what you feel is meaningful), so regularly refining plans ensures you’re giving energy to all aspects of your life.
The main reason people can’t stop thinking of work is because that is the ONE area they are focused on and have some meaning in. Other areas of people’s lives tend to be mostly on autopilot, which doesn’t really keep our attention in the present.
Which techniques do you suggest for balancing our passion with purpose?
Although I teach techniques, I always emphasise that they can’t do much for us on their own. The mind becomes restless when we lack a vision for life or have unresolved issues. A relaxed state of mind, however, helps the brain function cohesively and efficiently access memories, experiences, and information.
Using tools and techniques to avoid fears and responsibilities doesn’t work - just like forcing ourselves to be calm doesn’t work.
Many people, from my experience, only give priority to spiritual practices, meditation, and nature when they find the time. Since these practices transform our mind into energetic, clear and stable, it might be a good idea to prioritise them before anything else.
A relaxed brain helps us enter into a flow state, become more empathetic, and see the big picture. Being in a constant state of stress and anxiety can make the world seem like a place full of problems, in contrast. That’s not a perspective; that’s how our brain works.
You can avoid a stressed brain by building everything around your spiritual practices, which’ll give you a foundation for your dreams and well-being. The act of adding a calming practice at the end of a busy day won’t solve your deeper issues - you can compare it to having tools without the right plan to build a house.
And I’d like to emphasise to parents how useful it is to start these practices with their children from a young age. Younger people are naturally more adaptable and curious, and therefore their brain is more ‘fluid’ for positive change.
Unfortunately they are also constantly bombarded with messages about who they should or shouldn’t be; how they should look or not look; and can easily become addicted to short term dopamine and lose their liveliness.
These messages can make them become trapped in FOMO (fear of missing out), so integrating mindful practices early on can help them build resilience and navigate pressure.
Stay tuned for part 2 of this interview (going live on June 16, 2024), where Niki will share more on building a consistent mindfulness practice (also helpful if you have children and want to include them in it), techniques for having a fulfilling life despite chronic pain and illness, and overcoming resistance to meditation.
Below is Niki’s 15-minute focused, calm, and productive meditation.
With gratitude,
Raksha
Nice article. I particularly resonate with the fact that purposeful dopamine comes from engaging in meaningful work. My key takeaway is making time for spiritual practices rather than engaging in them when time permits.
I think it's spot on that we tend to fixate on work for value, because it's tied up with money. Thank you for that reminder and the meditation. I will give it a try!